Dear Russia,

You definitely don’t know me, but I’m writing to beg that you please don’t cut off the gas supply to Ukraine on January 1. Without gas, I won’t be able to cook on the stove, have hot water, or even have heat in my home.

I know Ukraine owes you a lot of money - 2 billion dollars to be exact - but it is the middle of winter, not to mention a day for celebration when said deadline must be met. Can’t the deadline be extended for some time in an act of compassion?

I wonder if this note will have any affect on you whatsoever, or if I should scurry to the market tomorrow in hopes of buying an electric kettle, space heater, and extra blankets? Please try to come to an agreement with this poor country soon because if not, this little popsicle might not make it.

Sincerely,
Brooke

I heard stories that it existed. Oftentimes, the story was followed with shock and horror if someone actually had a personal experience to add. I didn’t know what to think. Would I ever encounter this thing myself? Would I one day have my own story to tell?

Thanks to one of Tanya’s students, I now have my own story to tell. On the night of a party at our apartment - one we decided to throw when we thought we were moving apartments… go figure we got a phone call that very day that we were no longer moving! - Vitaly brought a nice big container full of the infamous SALO.

You’re probably wondering what exactly this salo stuff is, right? Well, Wikipedia says the following:

Salo (Russian and Ukrainian: са́ло) is a traditional Central and Eastern European food: slabs of pork underskin fat, with or without skin.

Mmmm…

The Slavic word “salo” as applied to this type of food (it has other meanings as well) is often mistranslated to English as “bacon” or “lard”. Unlike lard, salo is non-rendered pork fat

Double mmmm…

Anyways, the Ukrainians love this stuff. Apparently what you do is put a slab on a piece of black bread, maybe with some onion, and eat with vodka. So, that’s what Tanya and I bravely did. I think these pictures explain all:

Pretty good, huh? Yeah, it gets better…

I don’t know how many times in this one night Ukrainian people told me how HEALTHY salo is. Yes, healthy! I even had one guy tell me that he was so fit while showing his abs because he ate salo every day. And, in case you are fearing a nuclear war or explosion, it is also helpful to know that salo helps protect your body from radiation. Imagine that!

Look, winter sucks. It just does. I have never liked it, except for when I was a child and we had snow days from school and could go outside and play. Whenever I complain about the cold or the snow, people always say, “But you’re from Illinois. You should be used to this weather!”

I will never get used to this weather. I’m cold every day. In Ukraine, we have NO control over how hot our apartment gets. There is no thermostat to turn up or down when you start to see your breath at night. We often have no hot water to take a nice refreshing shower with in the mornings. Both of these things are controlled by the government, and last weekend, it was awesome to find out that nobody had hot water because the government just said no (apparently some sort of payment issue from the water company to the government I heard?).

Awesome, right?

In class, everyone still wears their coats because it is freezing! I found out that some schools are not restarting lessons until mid-February (a month later) because it will be too cold and they don’t want to heat the schools then. And, I’m always bombarded with comments like, “You think this is cold? Just wait until January…”

Yet again, awesome.

I just don’t think it affects people here as much as it does me. Most of the time, people walk around here acting like its no big deal, even when I can look up from downtown and see the temperature sign read -3 degrees!

It was during this time that some of my wonderful students took Tanya and I around Kyiv last weekend and to an art gallery and modern art museum. This was in the bathroom!

Normally, I don’t like modern art museums. They usually make me angry because I never feel like the person is actually being creative… but who am I to judge? However, the modern art museum here was very interesting. There were loads of random, random videos that kept me intrigued as I was desperately trying to avoid going back outside! Take for instance, this one of a woman eating an entire onion! It was absolutely bizarre. I wish I would have gotten the end, but I had to hide my camera.

Onion Eater Video Clip

Somehow I managed to survive the cold day and get some shots of being out and about (or oot and aboot as Tanya would say, haha!).

Marina

Larissa

Tanya

There have been much colder days than this one, but even on this day we knew it was bad when I was actually tempted to huddle around a random garbage can fire on the street in order to feel something resembling heat!

While not being happy with my decision to be in Ukraine at this moment in time, I have decided to preoccupy myself with a list of goals. The first one I’m going to address is increasing the amount of feed readers to this site (that would be those who read in a feed reader or get updates by email), as well as update all the information sections, such as the photo pages.

Now the first part isn’t a huge issue. I know many people check my blog, and I get loads of emails from readers with questions and such all the time, but its that number I see on the right column of the page that annoys me. It floats around 45-55 readers now and I’m thinking something more like 100 would be more pleasing to my eye. Yes, I know, I’m a little Monk-ish (I’ve taken the quiz), but please help to appease my mind by signing up for updates through feedburner. It’s quick, it’s easy, and it’ll spice up your inbox from time to time!

The second part is a little more annoying. I have a lot of information on this site from before I left in March and it has changed a lot since then. I also have a lot of photo uploading to do. I’m getting behind now! So, yes, I will do my best to get everything to an up-to-date level on the site soon - as long as I have internet at the moment. I won’t even get into the idea of being without it again when we move apartments. D’oh!

I have been sitting on this one for about a week now and decided to go ahead and post. About seven weeks ago, I made a blog post about struggling with goodbyes. I wasn’t particularly straightforward about the situation at the time, but while in the Baltic countries, I did meet someone I thought was really special… and of course it was frustrating to have to continue on and say goodbye for possibly forever to this person. I had to. I had an obligation to go to Ukraine and teach, right?

Well, said person and I kept in touch while in Ukraine. He was on another adventure with a friend from back home and didn’t think he would have enough time or money to get a visa for Ukraine, complete the journey with his friend, and then catch his flight back to Australia. That’s right. He’s Australian, too. Just when we thought seeing each other again wasn’t going to happen, I found out I was able to take a long weekend off work so we could meet somewhere in the middle. With this exciting news, we both ventured to Budapest last weekend!

I know I’ve said this before, but I have felt sort of cut off in Ukraine. It’s like once you’re here, getting out isn’t easy. Travel is slow… oh so slow! And just to make it more interesting, no one in Ukraine has the ability to book train tickets outside of Ukraine. They offer one train to Budapest, but I was not happy with when it would get me there - I was on limited time already! So, I took a gander at bahn.de and found a possible route, printed it off, and ran with it, not really knowing what was around the corner!

I took an overnight train to Chop, Ukraine, which is on the border of Hungary. I had a sleeper bed, which was actually quite enjoyable minus the sauna-like heat (but I can’t complain - it was like the first time I had felt real heat in a couple of months!). I had a carriage with all older women, which was nice. I got to practice a little Russian and drink tea with them. Once in Chop, though, things became frantic and exciting. I quickly bought my ticket to cross the border, scoured the small town for a place to get Hungarian money, dealt with customs and passport control, and ate dinner all in less than an hour’s time. I was getting nervous because I only had 15 minutes once in Hungary to buy my other tickets and catch my next train, so imagine my distress when we were forced to wait on the train until customs and border control checked each person’s bags and passports before letting us go! I decided to make a show of looking at the clock and my watch so they would get the hint I had to run, and that seemed to do the job! Sound stressful? Yeah, it was a bit, but I will tell you one thing… I LOVED every minute of it. I LOVE being on the road!

Twenty hours in the mix and I finally made it to Budapest’s Nyugati station with Patrick anxiously awaiting my arrival. After a few sighs of relief, we made our way out into the city and I was immediately taken by surprise. It was quite a different view than what I had become accustomed to in my tiny bubble in Kiev. And, imagine that, I saw sunshine that weekend! Amazing!

Ha! How cute are we?! So funny. I think my flash was doing something funky and it kept catching us mid-blink.

Back in Riga

We went for a long evening stroll along the Danube river, which was perfect for taking photos. Along the way, we ran into some sort of Christmas celebration where people had on devil horns and cape costumes. Not sure what that meant, but it was interesting! We ate at some great restaurants with awesome spicy food - Indian and Thai - YUM! We met up with people he had met there before and went out to a cool bar where I felt very short compared to all the giants nearby. Overall, it was amazing, and I found myself being visually stimulated by the city, and even more excited for the upcoming holidays after my stay.

Unfortunately, it was over way too soon, and I quickly found myself sitting on another train pulling out of the station - waving bye to Patrick for the third time in the past few months - forever this time? I was both happy and sad - happy to have had yet another encounter with him, but sad to be leaving and heading back to Ukraine.

Patrick said he thought I sounded more cynical this time around. Well, I told him that its just the way I have to deal with all the craziness that is Ukraine life. I can usually laugh off the awkwardness with a good, “Oh, that’s life in Ukraine!” comment. But, as I was sitting there on the train, my cynicism just turned to hate. I had already been feeling it for some time now, but it was all coming out. I was sitting there just seething with anger and frustration. Not only did I not feel like this was the way things should be, but I was also angry to be returning to the cold, to the dismal, to the cut-off. Whenever I told people in Budapest that I was living in Ukraine, they just said - “Why?! I always hear about how bleak it is there, and how unsafe it is there.”

Bleak. It’s like they took the word out of my mouth.

All of the issues I’ve encountered recently with living in Ukraine - a list I won’t get into at the moment - were rolling around in my head on the long, long 20 hour ride back “home”. I began to question why I was even here and I had to remind myself it was to practice my Russian, which is something I haven’t even done yet really (my lessons start on Monday). At each train change, I could see the temperature dropping, and finally, the snow came. The wind blew hard and Ukraine just looked even more bleak and dismal. What a perfect way to set the mood for my arrival in Kiev - a wet, dreary day.

I told Ukraine I hated it on Monday. Some of that hate passed after class when I got to teach my students, the only reason of which I really enjoy being a teacher, but the hate returned yesterday when we had a meeting at work (to deal with some issues, of course!). At this meeting, I also found out that Tanya and I will have to move to a new apartment in a couple of weeks! So, yet another way I can not ever feel at home here.

I think maybe all of my happy feelings were used up in Budapest and now I’m just left with the unhappy ones. I’m sure that will pass and I’ll get back to my cynical self soon and deal with Ukraine. And, it does suck that the long-awaited time with Patrick is over, but maybe without coming back to such circumstances I would not have appreciated the weekend as much (well, that’s definitely not true - just what I’m telling myself now haha).

*sigh*

1. Statistically, there are more women living in Ukraine than men. I’m just guessing on this one, but maybe it has something to do with drinking a lot, smoking a lot, and just plain getting into fights a lot. Any way, men are outnumbered.

2. Stereotypically, the women in Ukraine are beautiful. This, I have found to be quite true (except for sometimes when a beautiful girl smiles and then you notice the lack of attention to dental care… Kind of ruins the look, eh?). But, I have also found out that this is their job – looking beautiful. In Ukraine, women often don’t work and it is the responsibility of the man to provide for her. They just have to look pretty, and they do… They never leave the house disheveled. That only happens when they become babushkas!

So, you take number 1 and number 2, combined with Ukraine being a poorer country, and what do you get? Prime wife shopping territory for the Western man, no?!

I cannot, absolutely cannot!, count the number of times while traveling in the past few months that I have heard men comment about how beautiful the women are from these countries. Yeah, yeah, yeah already… It’s true, I get it. However, what I can’t get past is the extremely large number of companies that cater to helping foreign men find a wife from this part of the world.

When we arrived for training at the language school here in Kyiv, we were immediately put into a room where we watched a film called “A Foreign Affair”, which is about a couple of brothers who go on a love tour to Russia to find a bride. It is actually kind of amusing, but the director wanted us to see this film because perhaps there had been incidents in the past with the teachers coming purely for this reason.

In the film, the company the brothers used was called “A Foreign Affair” and the website is actually http://www.loveme.com. To my shock and surprise, as I was looking at my Kyiv map (in English), the company was actually listed on the back! And, next to this little guy was the listing for many, many other companies just like it!

Oh my. I still don’t know what to think of it… I mean what kind of man would actually take part in something like this? Unfortunately, there are probably plenty… There might even be a few extra plane tickets to Kiev booked after I post this entry.

This is true. I am currently at the ripe ol’ age of 25 – almost to the point where people start making jokes about pushing 30 (well, some already have). I don’t know how to take it. Whenever I log into FaceBook, I am always shocked by messages of people getting engaged, married, and now having babies! Ah! Usually, people are shocked to find out that I’m over 20, and I often shock myself when I tell them my real age.

Sometimes, it’s ok. Older people sometimes see me when I’m out and about and offer me help because they think I am a lost little girl. When I flew home from Kazakhstan, this older man that sat beside me kept getting me coffee, tea, and offering me food (even when I was trying to sleep). Waiting at the Kazakh embassy, an older woman made sure to tell the guard I was there before other people so I could get let in earlier. Yeah, sure that’s ok. Taxi drivers would often walk me to my marshrutka and help me bargain prices for long journeys. I’ll take whatever help I can get.

But, the thing is, I’m completely capable of dealing with these situations on my own. So, sometimes, it just seems patronizing. In class the other day, a girl asked me, “But you’re so young! How can you travel all the way to Ukraine by yourself?!” Ugh. Come on.

Oh, now, lucky me! It seems I have chosen the best location for people with problems of looking way younger than their age. From the first weekend here, Tanya and I have realized just how difficult guessing the ages of local people is! I actually had to take my roomie out onto the balcony to gossip, “Oh my goodness! She’s only 18?!” This was when we were sure the person was at least 23-ish!

This shock continued into the classroom. People my age often look well into their 30s, and so on. It is no lie, but the people here age differently than we do back in America.

So, why am I lucky?! Apparently, in a year’s time, I will also experience the aging benefits (?) of Ukraine! Another teacher explained that when he first got here, people always guessed him as being extremely young, but after almost a year, he is now pegged at his real age! Then, again, maybe that’s not lucky. I don’t know if I like the idea of aging 5 years in one.

Then, you might be wondering why this is true. I hadn’t thought much about it before coming back to Ukraine, but there was little incident some years ago known as Chernobyl… Yeah, ha, right? I always laugh when people make jokes about not drinking the water…

I like little things. I have always had an affinity for travel-sized shampoos, puppies that can be carried in a bag, and mini cars among many others. For me, finding something tiny and cute is like finding gold - and this can be applied to the details, as well. Yes, it is the fine details of my current life and living situation in Ukraine that I like to call my “little treasures.” Here are some of the things that bring a smile to my face every day.

These are just a few of the things I enjoy. There are also a number of things, or little treasures, that I can’t quite take pictures of. These might be little tid-bits of information that I can’t get past. Here are some of those jewels:

1 - It might shock and surprise you that it is quite common for people to just pay for their driver’s license instead of taking tests. Safe, no?!

2 - Dentists make more money than doctors here. And, if you want to have a good operation or care, you have to give your doctor a “gift”.

3 - The landladies here are just as crazy as they were back in Kyrgyzstan. They are known to just drop in and check things out whenever, and not quietly!

And there you have it - Just some of my little treasures from life in Ukraine!

Hollllllllly cowwwwwwww! I have a job! After a whirlwind two weeks (that seriously felt like 2 months) of training, Brooke has officially become a paid-member of the teaching staff at an English language school in Kiev. Ahhh!

I’m definitely kind of excited. Yes, a paycheck would be nice. But… but… oooh I must admit, my mind is already asking, “Where to next?!” Besides this nagging feeling of needing to move on, everything else in Kiev is treating me quite well. I love Ukrainian food: potatoes, dumplings, and borsch. I am remembering more Russian than I thought I would. Actually, the Russian is clearer to me now than it was on the streets of Bishkek, which may have something to do with my mind not being on meltdown from lessons during the day. And, I think I might not be so bad at this whole teaching thing.

For training I felt like nothing more than a substitute teacher, which is frustrating for both the teacher and the students. Now, I have my own classroom and students, most of which are in their lower 20s with a few younger and older thrown in the mix. I can build a lovely little rapport with them over the next 7 weeks (we do 7 week semesters) and hopefully get them speaking some English! Woo!

In order to teach effectively to people who know very little English, I’ve had to dumb down my speech dramatically. I can already tell this is starting to creep into my normal life. It reminds me of when I was working my IT job and started throwing words like “resolution” and “reboot” into every normal conversation. My job here is also to just make people talk, so I, of course, have become a pro at asking the right questions to keep people going.

I will hopefully get some pictures of all my work and classes in the near future. But, for now I must prepare another lesson!

Halloween this year, though not traditionally celebrated in Ukraine, was no other than a memorable experience. Now I didn’t get my annual dose of scary movies, passing out candy, or haunted houses (the closest thing we got was walking up the dilapidated black stairs to the party’s apartment), but I did get to have a few laughs thanks to the Ukrainian students and American teachers in the area.

Since the teacher trainees were all so busy last week, we didn’t really have time to find a costume, so at the last minute we found a website that had some last-minute ideas. I pinned a sign to my shirt that said, “Nudist on Strike.” Ross burned a DVD and tied that to his neck. He was a DVD burner. Tanya held on to a sign that said, “Go ceiling!” She was, of course, a ceiling fan. Nothing special, but at least we put in some sort of effort. We could have just showed up.

Anyways, when I think about that night, I cannot help but giggle. I must say that before I came to Ukraine, I was wondering what type of person would choose to move here to work. Well, I think Halloween night gave me the answer. Here are some pictures from my very, very, very strange evening.